Someone, although I couldn't tell you who, once famously said something profound about democracy being a bad form of government, but better than the rest. The more I see of this election process, the more wisdom I see in that, especially the "bad form" part.

It's obvious whoever said that had a much broader range of experience than I've had. Other than electing government representatives who ignore me except when they're courting my vote, I'm not sure I've seen very much democracy in action at all. Growing up I didn't have much say in how my family was run, and no job I've ever held or heard of is in any way democratic. It's always been more feudal, I think the term would be, than anything else, with rulers just telling me what to do.

After I moved out of my parents house and was living on my own, my home life was democratic, but only in the sense that there was only one vote on anything and that one my vote was mine. When I was in relationships, of course, there was still only one vote, but it was no longer mine. The women always have the trump card, all the power, and I have no argument with that.

Anyway, whoever said that famous quote about democracy must never have seen McCain and Palin's supporters. There are lots of them, maybe a majority, but very few of these people show me much of anything that would lead me to believe that they should have a say in how anything important is decided. The world, now, and maybe for quite some time, has been too complicated for me to figure out, and I think I'm one of the bright ones. With so much going on, and so little of it black and white or easily reducible, common people just don't stand a chance.

And, yet, we give them all votes.

In spite of their having invented democracy, or so I've heard, it's just a shame that Plato's elites never took hold. People who run things and make decisions should have skill sets that go beyond coaxing the electorate to think they're the ones who can best represent them. Palin has a great stage presence and can give a whopper of a speech, but I don't trust her judgment on anything I feel is important. Obama, also, gives great speeches, but at least he seems to have thought about what he's saying instead of just telling us what we want to hear.

All I'm saying is that I'm not sure I wouldn't be equally miserable living under some sort of meritocracy. I don't think only white landowners should vote, but I also don't think all these yahoos yelling USA! or scowling whenever the terms Bush, socialist, elitist, or liberal is tossed at them from instinctive reactions are the ones I want setting my future, either.

I'm not sure if another revolution will ever come, but I doubt I'll be alive when it happens. In my life, sadly, only other stuff happens.

Things this political season have changed so much that I think it's safe to say they're exactly the same.

I'm not sure what it says about humanity, but one thing I've learned as we approach this election is that no matter what gets brought up by either side, no matter what incident gets mentioned by the press, no matter how any event or issue is spun by those running the campaigns, people immediately fall straight into line. It doesn't matter if it's Governor Sarah Palin appearing on Saturday Night Live or anything else, those in her party will proclaim it a success and those on the other side will call it lame.

I don't even have to look at the source anymore. If someone discovers that Obama wrote a blurb for Ayers' book, the right will see this as further evidence of something or other and the left will say "so what."

I suspect the only reason these things get mentioned at all, anything from McCain's association with Liddy to Obama's 57 state comment, is to get each side's supporters off their asses and into the voting booths. With the dismal turnout that we in America usually show, I think either side can win if they just get over three-fourths of their supporters out. Karl Rove was famous for this, not only in trying to get all the Republicans to vote, but for trying to depress the Democrats enough that they'd choose to sit home and cry rather than vote for Gore or Kerry.

No, I'm talking about voter suppression at the polls, or the sometimes questionable purging of registered voters, merely attempts to keep people at home. President Clinton, now, may be trying to do that by his repeated assertions that the election is in the bag for Obama, that it's going to be a wipeout. His message strikes me as being close to "this thing is won, don't bother showing up," a message that would help his wife while also being one he can point to as showing his support for the Democrats.

Anyway, one thing I'm sure of is that whatever gets released will be pointed at by one side as being important while simultaneously subject to innocent explanations by the other. Anything may get "your" side out, get them riled up enough to vote, but very little of it adds anything to political discourse.

Then, again, if someone can proclaim "Country First!" while selecting a uniquely inept person to be his running mate, pretty much everything is possible.

Like a lot of people, I watched the presidential debates the other night. Unlike most of them, including the politicians, I spent a little time thinking about personal hygiene. Or, freshness.

If I were to be in one of these nationally televised debates and setting myself up to be judged by tens of millions of people who would decide my fate, before I went on onstage I think I'd want to take a shower. Not necessarily to get clean, but it might be refreshing and relaxing.

As soon as I thought that, I pictured myself telling my advisors and staff about it, that I needed to take a break and take a shower. This is something I can do now, without mentioning it to a soul, so right off the bat, that would be different. It would also be different that anyone would be interested in my wanting to take a shower.

That interest, among a ton of other, more important things, is what distinguishes me from these politicians. I thought about it some and realized that I can't fathom what it would be like to have thousands of people wanting some of my time. Right now hardly anyone does, but if I were running for president, a team of secretaries couldn't keep up with the demands on my time. Other politicians, media people, people wanting favors or thrusting wads of cash into my hand in hopes of future ones, tons of people wanting a piece of me, a chance to talk or listen to me, all of them would be asking for my attention.

I don't think I could handle it.

I'm a student of history only insofar as having passed whatever classes I needed to pass to get a degree in an unrelated subject. And, this was all back in the day when the only history that counted was western history.

About an hour ago I couldn't remember the product of nine times nine. Worse, even after backing into it through arithmetic, the answer I got didn't feel "right." Eighty-one, the answer I arrived at, didn't give me any sense of relief or satisfaction, such as I usually get when I remember the name of the submarine on the TV show Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea.

I don't have any more need for multiplication than most people, and I have plenty of calculators and websites that could either figure it out or display the results for me, so getting the answer wasn't the problem. The reason I was so scared is this is something I should know, inside out, whenever I need to.

I'm convinced my mind is going, is developing holes, and I see that as further evidence that I'm reaching the end.

If it took me a moment to recall the answer, or especially I reacted to the right answer with a sigh of relief, I wouldn't be feeling so bad. But when I eventually figured it out, or remembered it, the void that met that answer disturbed me. The answer should have filled me with glee and joy, and it felt, instead, like foreign territory.

I'm struggling with remembering words, too, which doesn't bode well for my attempts to actually finish some writing again. I'm scared because I know there isn't simple solution, there isn't any magic pill I can take to get my mind back, and I'm afraid that it's going to grow worse and worse.

I can't expect, and probably won't seek, any medical help, because I'd feel foolish. Whatever is causing this is no doubt a result of my past, and I should have known better all along. I don't want to burden anyone, and I won't be happy watching myself deteriorate.

Maybe it was just a blip, a "one off," and it's silly for me to be concerned at all. Maybe that's it.

No, I'm not going to write one and this gem of Ginsberg's isn't a sonnet, either, but I liked the alliteration for the title of this entry.

I wrote some poetry, of course, when I was young and filled with angst and self-loathing. While those remain, the poetry didn't because I convinced myself I don't have much talent in creating any. Still, I've always reserved a part of my life for poetry, one which I return to fairly frequently.

The thing about poetry is that it slows me down. Unlike the web pages that are so popular now, reading poetry takes time. You can't skim poetry, can't jump stanzas or skip to the end to see how it turns out. To appreciate poetry, you have to read every word, digest them, roll them across you mind and savor their selection and placement. Poetry, I believe, isn't written to convey a thought or idea as much as a feeling or sensation. The poet, the ones I like, anyway, use words primarily as a means to create in my mind a particular attitude. The words are the instruments the poet uses to make my mind feel what she or he is feeling more than having strong intrinsic value.

"I'm feeling this," the poet seems to be saying, "and by using these particular words, in this particular order, I can make you feel the same."

Even though I no longer even try to write poetry, I still take the time to read it. Sometimes, it's true, I have to force myself to take that time, but I always feel better after doing so. I cannot help but have my mind, attitude, and outlook changed by reading good poetry, and I can even study it and see how important words are. The choices the poet needs to make are far beyond my ability to mimic, but my appreciation for the language and how much fuller and richer it can be when handled well by someone who knows what he or she is doing gives me hope and inspiration.

You betcha, it does.

A couple of years ago, when Time magazine named me person of the year, I thought I'd reached my peak. I hadn't done much that year that I recall, but evidently someone was keeping an eye on me and my doings, someone credible and responsible, and someone with pull at a major news magazine.

While they neglected to give me a free copy, which I considered the least they could do, especially considering how my election could only increase their sales, and I never bought one, I still hold that award proudly in my heart, if not on my bookshelf.

Until lately, I've admittedly been in a bit of a slump. My awards, and my esteem, to use a recently popular term, have cratered, but I was somewhat heartened to realize that no less a person than one of the candidates for president of the United States considers me one of the fundamentals of the nation's economy.

That's pretty impressive, too, by any measure. I had no idea I was so important, or, once again, even noticed by anyone who spent any time east of the Mississippi. The sad thing is, using me as a fundamental, doesn't speak well for the economy or for the nation's prospects.

Still, the recognition was well received by me, and the luster had only begun to fade when last night, on nationwide TV, another candidate, this time one for vice-president, looked straight at me and winked at me! More than once!

She's mildly attractive, like some clerk at a drug store, but I'm pretty sure she's making lots of money and, if her wink is to believed, she's willing to share some of either of those things with me.

Maybe both.