The other day when shopping I picked up some organic bananas, something I'd never had before. From my science classes I knew that "organic" meant there was carbon in them, and I wondered if I could taste it. I don't taste as well as I used to, but even if I couldn't taste the carbon I figured it would do me some good. Maybe help my kidneys with the filtering or, if I were lucky, it might make me lightweight and stealthy.

I didn't have any choice, really. The market didn't have any "regular" bananas, not that I could see, but everyone shopping there just looked so much healthier than those I normally see that I knew I was onto a good thing. And, not only healthier, but I had a hunch they were all wittier and also better in bed. These were the people I could see at one glance that were the ones reaping fully of the benefits of living in 21st Century America. Gods and Goddesses, every one.

I wasn't too fooled about the banana, though. In spite of the carbon I knew it was the same banana I'd been eating all my life. Since the early 1920s there's only been one banana sold in the US, and by "one banana" I mean exactly that.

Bananas are one of my favorite fruits, but I realize they're a marvel of cultivation and genetic modification. They're sterile, we've bred the seeds right out of them, and each and every banana is genetically identical. They're clones, if you will, and if you thought there was really only one banana plant and all they were doing was hacking of bits of it and replanting it to make two plants, you'd be right.

You can make some good money in bars with this information. Pick anyone under eighty and bet them they've never had more than one banana. Everyone we know, most likely, and us have all been eating the same banana all our lives.

That's going to change, however, once the banana blight kills off this plant. I understand banana scientists are hard at work right now trying to find a successor to our current banana, which I think is called the "cavendish." It replaced some "gold" or "golden" something or other, the banana that I'm told was tastier but was wiped out and generated the song "Yes, We Have No Bananas."

I doubt a similar song will be spawned, but one can hope.

Anyway, this organic banana, not surprisingly, tasted good, and I could hardly discern the carbon.