How I Lay Me Down To Sleep

I spend about a third of my life sleeping, which pretty much makes me an expert on that subject, but I really shine when it comes to falling asleep, which I do well over a thousand times a year. You could say I get plenty of practice at it, mostly because I can't sleep more than three hours without waking up.

It's not the most interesting of topics, I know, but that's never stopped me from writing about things before.

Now, calendar freaks may object, but it's officially winter here. I know this because the heater goes on, even when I don't set it. The thermostat goes down to fifty, and when it kicks in I know two things: it's cold outside and that means it's cold inside, as well.

I'm comfortable in the cold, but even I have my limits and one of my favorite things to do is go to bed. I love it when my bedroom is cold, but when I'm toasty warm under the bedding. I get a sense of accomplishment heating up that cold bed.

Then, I decide to go to sleep. At this point, one of two things results:

(1)    I'm more comfortable laying on my side, often with my knees drawn up. I'm more comfortable laying on my left side, but I've been told that's bad for the heart, so after laying on my left, I switch to laying on my left side in the same position, get comfortable, and close my eyes.

I like that part. It's so cute. It's charming. We close our eyes and then fall asleep.

(2) All the above happens, but instead of drifting off to sleep, I start thinking. This is never a good thing.

It's not that I worry, I just ... think. I mostly "write" things, blog entries or stories ideas, but most often perfectly craft sentences. Or, I think about women and how nice they are, or about people I know and if they think of me as often as I do them, and to what end. Or, really, I think about anything.

When something pops into my head that I don't want to think about, usually something I need to do and haven't, the best way for me to get it out of my head is to change position and flop over onto my other side. This often works, but between stretching my legs out and curling them back up, trying it with a single leg, and remembering that I shouldn't go to sleep on my left, I don't have very many positions to take that will cleanse the horrible thought from my mind. After two or three such rude awakenings, I'm sort of out of options.

I do have a couch I can sleep on, and there's a loveseat I can cram myself intwo, but neither of them are very good for sleeping unless there's a football game on. What I'd like, of course, is a guest bedroom, but the space for that is filled with computers and junk.

The good news is, if I don't think, I sleep. If I don't think, though, I'm not me.