Doing As The Romans Do

Now, I'm about as Catholic as Osama bin Laden, but that doesn't stop me from celebrating Lent. It's not as if I believe they're right or that they've grasped some handle that eludes me, or even some worthy display of solidarity, either, it's just that I believe it's a good thing from time to time to go without.

That's a good thing, too, because if there's anything I can claim to know, it's doing without.

Lacking even the most rudimentary of Catholic educations, I don't claim to exactly understand Lent, but I think it means that for the next month and a half I'm supposed to give up something to make it easier for me to get into heaven or something. Worse, what I'm supposed to do without isn't supposed to be something easy like sit-ups or pickled eel that I wouldn't even notice I wasn't avoiding, but has to be something I'd really like.

The simple answer, of course, would be cigarettes since that melds nicely into something I'm doing anyway, but I think that disqualifies it from being a Lent-worthy sacrifice.

I could give up lamb, which I enjoy quite a bit, but since I only get to indulge in that particular passion once or twice a year, I'm not sure passing up on lamb until April 11th would be very much of a stretch.

I suppose I could be selfish, not give up anything, and just go on living like normal, but I'm not very happy with how self-absorbed that would make me. Oh, sure, I could claim a religious exemption, but if I'm to be a member of society, I can't just go and willfully ignore what a decent percent of the population is going through. That would be as dumb as refusing to acknowledge the importance of kosher food.

I have a couple left, but I think I'll give up hard boiled eggs. I like those a lot and have them whenever I think of them or get a new dozen of the eggs from Trader Joe's that have some sort of egg information lasered right onto their shells, but I hope I don't forget how to boil them during my short time away from them.

I also hope I don't get thrown into any jail and be forced to make my mark there without my calling.