Baffled

For someone so experienced, I sure have trouble with simple things.

Like e-mail.

A good part of my frustration and bafflement can be explained by acknowledging that I'm frightened and fearful. I like it not only when I think I know what's going on, but when everything's in one place, easy to get to, and familiar. This all changed last summer when my computer died, taking along with it years of e-mail and e-mail related stuff. That old e-mail program and all its contents are now safe, but not accessible.

When I got a new computer, I installed a new e-mail program, but I considered it temporary. I figured I'd get the old one back soon, but that just shows how little I know myself. Temporary fixes and bandages seem to hang around forever in my life, until they either crash and burn or, by default, become permanent.

A couple days ago my e-mail program stopped working. Well, not exactly. It worked, but couldn't find its way to the Internet or any of the servers that hold my e-mail. I downloaded and re-installed my e-mail program, thinking that might help, but it didn't. Still, no connection.

This was after a Vista update, so, naturally, I thought that update might be the problem. So, I restored, turning my computer back to how it was before the update. This had the effect of rendering my e-mail program completely useless. It wouldn't even launch.

So I got another, a third, e-mail program and got it to work. I also noticed in all my monkeying around that I'd never told any of my temporary e-mail programs to delete any messages from the servers, which explains why so many people have been telling me about my e-mails bouncing. I was leaving them there until I got my old e-mail program working again, and forgot about it.

I think I made enough room to last me through the end of the year, but I expect by now most people have simply written me off. Oh well. They deserted reading my blog a long time ago, and I survived that!

I now have a working e-mail program that I don't like very much, but it's one I used to use years ago (Eudora). I have one I like, Thunderbird, that doesn't connect to the Internet any more, and I should really get off my ass and figure out how to make it functional.

But I'm cold today, and my right hand doesn't feel like typing .